While the season is wonderful in some ways, for those who are literally half way around the world from family and close friends, it also brings its own challenges. Sinhu posted a thoughtful reflection on her blog “the rest is still unwritten”.
Author: between worlds
A different daughter in law
Sometimes I grow weary of hearing folks complain about Mother-in-laws. I know they aren’t often a bed of roses, but it’s good to hear about good ones once in awhile, especially the cross-cultural ones. Amanda has a great post on her blog about dealing with meeting her future MIL.
BOOK: Teach like your hair’s on fire
I’m currently reading “Teach like your hair’s on fire: the methods and madness inside room 56” by Rafe Esquith. Rafe teaches in inner city LA and has students who have made significant gains. He has the students read literary classics and perform Shakespeare. Rafe has received many awards and recognitions for his work. Here’s an NPR story about his work.
Raising kids in two cultures
Sandra Whitehead has an excellent article on parenthood.com about raising bi-cultural kids. It’s the first in a series called Bicultural Families: Meeting the needs of raising children with two cultures.
Part 1: Meeting the Challenges of Raising Children With Two Cultures
Part 2: Helping Kids Embrace Both Cultures
Part 3: Stages of Cultural Identity
Well-stated.
Consumerism and middle ground
On a recent post discussing multiracial dolls, the discussion turned toward consumerism and what we teach our children through our purchases for them. In light of the coming holiday season, it feels like a particularly pertinent issue. Kathy Khang’s comment got me thinking:
“I’m not sure where the middle is. When you find it, please blog about its whereabouts. The very fact that we here in America can sit around and discuss the moral pros and cons of buying a doll speaks volumes, never mind the actual cost of said hypothetical doll purchase. It is not an easy call. Just because I choose not to buy the $100 doll or coat or whatever doesn’t necessarily mean I’ve taught my children anything. I’ve found explaining our choices – big and small – in ways that connect with them has gone a long way. And there is the delicate balance of need and want, again a privilege for some of us.
Some tough questions, particularly for those of us living in middle class America! Now, in the spirit of total disclosure, I admit that I have absolutely no idea where the middle is. One of the great advantages of being in an intercultural marriage is that I have daily opportunity to discuss these questions with someone who has had intimate views of life in the developing world. Whereas I may view a $100 doll as a wise investment, to be cherished and taken care of for life, my husband can see it as completely unnecessary because some children never even have toys. For us, the middle is still nebulous, but we work to find a middle ground. This year, it’s a $25 knock-off (probably made in a sweatshop…can you ever win?) doll. Continue reading “Consumerism and middle ground”
Advent Conspiracy
Great little video about making Christmas meaningful. Check out their website.
BOOK REVIEW: Finding Calcutta: What Mother Teresa taught me about meaningful work and service
By Mary Poplin
Deep down, my absolute favorite thing to do is shop. As I write this, I’m internally scheming how to get the biggest bang for my buck on my next errand. I like things, especially pretty ones, and acquiring them makes me feel good. As I’ve come to recognize this passion of mine, I’ve found it nagging at me a bit. I know people who hate to shop. On top of that, they also hate to accumulate clutter. Their personality enhances their ability to live simply. Not me. I feel better with full bookshelves, cupboards, and drawers. I find malls comforting and thrift stores exhilarating. Quite likely, my pension to store up treasures here on earth runs a bit too deep.
Enter: Mother Teresa, Mary Poplin, Ron Sider, and Shane Claibourne. Since recognizing the grip that my materialism has on me, I’ve embarked on a slow (and slightly reluctant) quest to examine it. I owned the book Rich Christians in an Age of Hunger (by Ron Sider) for about five years before I had the guts to actually read it. Then I joined the crowd reading Irresistible Revolution to find myself completely captured by its fresh and clear vision. This fall, I came across Finding Calcutta: What Mother Teresa taught me about meaningful work and service by Mary Poplin. I’ve long admired Mother Teresa’s work and wisdom; and have also wanted to hear more from Mary Poplin since she spoke on education and poverty at the university where I teach. In spite of my reluctance, my worldview is being reshaped by such books, and my shopping habits are certainly being redefined! Continue reading “BOOK REVIEW: Finding Calcutta: What Mother Teresa taught me about meaningful work and service”
Multiracial Dolls
So my daughter wants a doll that looks like her for Christmas, and it’s created a bit of turmoil for me. My husband and I are not particular fans of American Girl for a variety of reasons (i.e. reinforcing racial stereotypes, mass consumerism, price, etc.), but I’d like to get a doll the same size so that we can take advantage of all the ‘stuff’ available for 18″ dolls…
So far, here’s what I’ve found as options:
Karito Kids – Nice dolls, but expensive and 21″
My Twinn – Also expensive, and 24″
Dolls Like Me – has lots of different multiracial dolls
Friends Forever Girls – pictured here – this could be a good option! 18″ – Anyone out there already have one? How do they hold up?
Anyone know of others?
What would Jesus buy?
I just watched this ‘mockumentary’ by Morgan Spurlock while folding my mounds and mounds of laundry this afternoon. Reverend Billy and his ‘stop shopping’ choir tour the country preaching the evils of consumerism. It’s a good pause for thought before entering the Christmas season to be thoughtful of what I purchase, where I shop, and how I think about the season and all it entails… You can watch the full video on Google Video.
Talking about race with your kids
Natasha Sky has an interesting article on her blog, Multiracial Sky, on talking to children about race. An excerpt:
The key to talking with your child—or anyone—about race is the same key to discussing any complex subject: openness. Start an open dialog with your child about race early in their life. Make it a comfortable subject of conversation—for you, and for your child.
Her post also includes some excellent book recommendations. Click here for of my own more book ideas on teaching kids about race. Be sure also to explore her website – it has some EXCELLENT resources and is worth perusing.
Thoughts on raising a mixed raced child
Colorblind Cupid has an interesting series of posts on raising mixed race children. There’s a wide range of perspectives represented and some interesting thoughts.
Here is my response to her post:
oh, do i have so much i could say about this!!! where to start?
to be honest, one of the most exciting things for me about marrying a non-white man (other than the fact that i was gaga over him as a person) was the fact that my children would not inherit my pasty white (as my DH affectionately calls it) skin. no need to read this as distaste for my own background, only that milky brown skin is truly, undeniably beautiful. why would i not want it for my children? i’d worked with so many beautiful non-white children that it thrilled me to pieces that my children could actually look like them instead of me.
that being said, my children’s features do look quite a bit like me. its funny though, because white people say they have my husband’s coloring and brown people say they have mine. go figure. on occasion, my husband says he feels left out because they look more like me than him at the moment. i tell him its ok because sometimes they act more like him than me 
so while it hasn’t really been much of a problem for me that my kids’ skin isn’t the same hue as mine, the one thing that has been hard is for my daughter to understand why her skin is not the same as mine. recently, she’s really been trying to come to grips with this.
Wild Surmise (this is beautiful)
I’m a sucker for beautifully written, meaningful works, and this one by Jennifer Mattern on how mothers attending to the little moments in life somehow connects us to the rest of the world tops the week, or maybe even the month.
Sophie and I went to the library.
Seven words.
Sophie and I went to the library.
Seven ordinary words, marking the passing of a benign, seemingly mundane event. Almost no reason to mention it. A child. A mother. A library. So what?
After all, there are bigger events. There is a world at large, and my, it’s large. Tanking economy. Greedy banks. Bloody wars. Power struggles. Politics and pundits, media glee.
We are aware of the blazing ring of fire circling us. In the middle of it, we change diapers. We wipe little bottoms. We shop in bulk. We return overdue books at the library. We go to work. We try to find work. We love and we lose our spouses, our children, our way. We cry in the shower. None of this gets much press.
And yet.
*****
I think most of you who come here, come here because you have a hunch there is meaning in the small events. Not all of you are sure of this, but most of you—like me—hope it’s true. That the library trips and grocery errands and baths and Vicks Vapo-Rub all matter, somehow. That they matter more than the fire raging all around us, burning nothing but itself.
Read the rest here.
There’s a hole in the bucket
Here’s a powerful video from Make Poverty History on forgiving debt in developing countries.
For a slightly different take, check out my previous post on Make Affluence History…
Celtic prayer – Giving God a lake of beer
So I read this in my devotions this week and was quite tickled by it. Thought I’d share 🙂
I’d like to give a lake of beer to God
I’d love the Heavenly
Host to be tippling there
For all eternity.
White cups of love I’d give them
With a heart and a half.
Sweet pitchers of mercy I’d offer
To every man.
I’d sit with the men, the women and God
There by the lake of beer.
We’d be drinking good health forever
And every drop would be a prayer.
– St. Brigid
between worlds 